Experience speaks..

Of late most conversations with my mother seem to be centred around the same topic. I usually take her advice on people management, what with her plethora of experience managing people. Perhaps this sounds strange if you dont have to interact with relatives on an everyday basis. With friends its different. Its more casual and you are pretty sure of how they would react.

But with relatives, you have to be more gaurded. They are constantly judging you, watching your every move, critiquing every word that you utter. If i had it my way, I would have thrown all caution to wind and wouldnt have cared a damn and spoken out what exactly i think of them, but sometimes it doesnt work that way. You need to have that harmony and maintain outwardly appearances atleast for the family's sake. That way i am lucky that K's parents are some of the nicest people i know and i dont have to worry about such things with them.

Anyway, coming back to what i started off with, one such conversation i had with my mom, it was interesting to note her reaction . "try to do those things which people want, especially with those who are always judging you and waiting for that one wrong move from your side. One should never give an opportunity for them to comment on you. With people who matter , its different, they understand you." However warped that logic sounds, i have seen that it works. Atleast you are at peace with yourself and spared all the negativity which would arise otherwise.

I have seen more often than not , sometimes experience in dealing with people matters more than just "doing the right thing". You sometimes have to compromise and do whatever it is that people want you to do. That way you are at peace. I guess thats the reason that she has successfully managed a big and happy household for 30 odd years.

She has humongous amounts of patience and tolerance for all kinds of people.Not sure if i can emulate her, but one thing that i have decided is atleast be patient when dealing with people, even though they have been nasty in the past and dont deserve the attention. Sigh, quite a task it will turn out to be.

Writing prompt

Writing prompt # 4 from blogpourri

Rules: Take 10 minutes to write. Please time yourself. When you have finished writing, please leave a link to your response in the comments box. Have fun!

Prompt: Write about an ordinary, everyday event in your family's life. It could be something that your mother or father did every day - ironing clothes, cutting vegetables, doing puja. Or something one of your siblings did - washing the moped or scooter, perhaps. May be even something that all of you did together regularly.

This was not an everyday event but a Sunday morning ritual throughout my childhood. It was the only thing that prompted me to wake up early even on Sundays. Back then when it was a large family and a small house, we would sleep on mattresses spread on the living room floor. And without missing a single Sunday, my sis and I would wake up to the strains of the title track of Rangoli on Doordarshan. We would lie in bed and watch the program wide-eyed lest we miss a single moment of the 30 minute show. We would be thrilled to bits if they telecast songs from the latest movies. We would also tease dad to no end when his favorite actress, Hemamalini started hosting the show.
That half an hour would transport us to a technicolor world only to be brought back to reality once the program ended. It would only keep us wishing every day was Sunday.

At Death's door...

I was returning home from office and saw a group of people huddled in front of the neighbour's house. I didnt make too much of it. I thought it was just a bunch of women gathered around to share local gossip. Being new to the neighborhood we have not yet reached a stage of familiarity where we indulge in friendly banter with neighbors. It was only later in the night when we saw an ambulance parked by that something was amiss. And we learnt that a 30-year old man had committed suicide. As we learned more, i realised that i had actually known the guy when a bunch of us kids had given a program on radio. That was 15 years ago and i hadnt seen him after that.

The news of his death saddened me and the realisation that i had actually known the person hit me hard. I remember him as a gangly kid with bright eyes and a ready smile. He was the most talkitive amongst us kids.

I still cant fathom what was so unbearable in his life that prompted him to end it. What could have been so irreversible that he resorted to this heinous act?
What went through his mind in those last few minutes before he made the decision?
How did he summon up so much courage to knock on death's door?

These questions, i know are the same that his family is trying to seek answers for.
His parents will never know his last thoughts. I can only pray that they find solace in this difficult time. I can only pray that his soul rests in peace.

Bangalore's answer to Rama Sena

Here is what Bangalore's doing in response to the Mangalore pub attacks and other atrocious claims by Rama Sena

http://bangalore.citizenmatters.in/articles/view/800-bangaloreans-oppose-moral-policing